Wayward Pines: Automatically one of the worst endings in the history of ever.

Sure, when Fox cancelled Almost Human - giving as their only real explanation its production cost (and yet, the upcoming Minority Report looks to be just as expensive) - I was plenty miffed. But I somehow decided to give Wayward Pines a chance anyway.

It was a mistake.

I want those ten hours of my life back.

[SPOILERS!]
So our protagonist's noble sacrifice, when you get right down to it, was basically for nothing. Somehow, a group of heavily-armed adults - including at least two trained federal agents, if not other outright military personnel - in a fortified mountain stronghold were seemingly easily overwhelmed by a small group of unarmed children. Children who, might I add, apparently also scaled a previously-destroyed elevator shaft (as established via the aforementioned sacrifice).
[/SPOILERS!]

Dinky Reviews!

Ex Machina (2015). Starring the guy who inexplicably got the part of Apocalypse in the upcoming X-Men film instead of Stargate SG-1's Christopher Judge.

(Note: If you're like me, you'll want to go into this with as little information beforehand as possible [all I knew was that it somehow involved an android, and that she looked pretty cool]. If that's the case, you may want to read no further - avoiding as you do what could, in only the vaguest sense, be roughly construed as "spoilers.")

Robot Carnival. An anthology anime film, it could've been perfect... if not for one segment in particular.

You know the one.

On the off chance that you don't, it's entitled "Presence" and - with the possible exception of "Franken's Gears" - it sticks out like a sore thumb. This is because, amid all Robot Carnival's glorious action and/or comedy, "Presence" is like the most tragic, depressing thing ever.

Similarly, Ex Machina is four-fifths a great film. Then the climax arrives... and it's such a one-hundred-and-eighty degree tonal shift from what's come before that it's likely to give you narrative whiplash.

This isn't to say you shouldn't go see it. Everything leading up to that unfortunate resolution is both thought-provoking and engaging.

But please, do keep your expectations in check.

And now, the actual [SPOILERS!]

To those who've seen Robot Carnival: If you ever wanted to see what it would've been like if the robot girl from "Presence" wrought her vengeance upon humankind - well, here's your chance.

To those who've already seen Ex Machina: When you get right down to it, didn't AVA actually fail the test? All she did was trick the one person who was most predisposed to being fooled in such a manner by using the resources she was specifically given/built with to achieving such an end.

Basically, her creator - whether knowingly, or not (and to what purpose - neither issue being addressed in the film itself) - cheated; tricking some poor dupe into believing AVA was truly sentient.

...or was she? This goes back to the positive - namely, the way one continues to consider the larger implications and overall themes of this film once it's over: While AVA might arguably have consciousness, she certainly doesn't have a conscience - or, at the very least, she's amoral.
[/SPOILERS!]

Hmm - this wound up being a not-so-dinky review, didn't it?

Don't waste your time and money on Oculus.

After my temporary position at my job ended, I was technically demoted and took a pay cut just to stay on (and yet, I'm still classified as temporary - go figure!). Needless to say, I haven't been in much of a mood to post lately - so you know this must be important/believe me when I say: You know that movie, Oculus? It SUUUUUUUCKS.

Dinky Reviews!

Elysium (2013). Starring Wikus van de Merwe, the tough chick from Predators, scenes shot in such a way as to showcase Jodie Foster's backside, and... look, I'm still trying to mentally separate Matt Damon's other roles from his love scene with Michael Douglas in Behind the Candelabra, all right?

Sadly, if you too have Bourne witness to the omnipresent trailers and advertisements for this film, you've seen roughly four-fifths of it already! I mean, I get wanting to fill up those seats in the theaters... but this was the wrong way to do it.

You've likely already seen another ending that's fundamentally the same as this one, too! This is such a pronounced step down from the brilliance which is the director's previous movie, District 9.

Leave "Man of Steel" alone!

Is it better than Superman (1978), or Superman II (the "Richard Donner Cut," at any rate)? Is Henry Cavill better as Superman than Christopher Reeves? Is Michael Shannon a better Zod? Is Man of Steel a better movie than 2012's The Avengers? The answer to all of these questions - perhaps unsurprisingly - is no.

A far more important question, however, is this: Was it, and were they, supposed to be?

What, exactly, was everybody expecting? This was never going to be (at a guess, from all the flack this film is catching) the next Lawrence of Arabia - not when all it ever really needed to be was better than Superman Returns!

You know two words that I would use to describe Man of Steel? Try "resonant," and "relevant." When did everyone become so incapable of just appreciating a movie for its thematic elements and emotional core?

This film has moved me on a personal level in a way that few others ever have. Consequently, I've now seen this movie in theaters a total of four times.

Seriously, people: Quit slagging on Man of Steel! Not only is it a good movie - it's maybe even a great one.

EDIT - I'm calling it now: Man of Steel - the most misunderstood, unfairly maligned movie of recent times.

I might someday write an additional post wherein I'd detail exactly what it is that makes me feel the way I do about this film, in the hopes of offering up another point-of-view on a subject about which others may have been too quick to judge. You know, if there's actually a demand for such a thing.

HeroClix: Incredible Hulk figure reviews!

I wrote the following in the hopes that it would help me remember, play and face the dials that I might see in the Infinity Gauntlet Month One Event for HeroClix. As that tournament was a sealed event using boosters from the Incredible Hulk set, this information really is only useful now in such a setting. However, leftover product from said expansion is so inexpensive that recreating such an environment amongst friends for funds is now entirely feasible! (Note: I apologize to those who were brought here whilst searching the names of characters mentioned herein, but were looking instead for information concerning them in a non-HeroClix context.)

Common Hulk has nine clicks. His best clicks are four and five – so try to hit him for two or three, and then hit him again hard. Consider Outwitting Charge first because he has no range, and then he won't be able to move-and attack. Offensively, Perplex down his defense – and defensively, Perplex down his damage.

Bruce Banner has five clicks. He only has Outwit and Toughness on his first click – so unless your opponent plans to transform him on his final three clicks, just finish him off quickly.

AIM Agent has four clicks. He has Perplex on his first two clicks, and gets Support after that – so do two damage quickly, because Support is only of limited usefulness in this set.

Hulkbuster Soldier has four clicks. With Armor Piercing versus figures that have four or more damage, he's a nuisance piece for sure – so knock him past his first two clicks of Running Shot and Toughness at your first opportunity.

Humanoid has four clicks. With no range, and no move-and-attack abilities (although he gets Willpower with The Leader), he can be safely ignored in the early game.

Hulk Robot has nine clicks. He's got Willpower, and his powers can't be Outwitted. His best clicks are clicks three, four and five, because he gets Charge. Try to just hit him for one, and then follow up with a big hit for four. Shape Change on his first click will make him hard to hurt at first. On click five, he loses Invulnerability and gets Toughness instead – so get him there quickly.

She Hulk has seven clicks. Although her best click is her second, she's going to bring the pain on each and every click. She loses move-and-attack on click three, and also only has Toughness for defense – so try to use that to your advantage. Hit her for four damage straight up, or Outwit her first-click Invulnerability and hit her for two.

John Jameson has five clicks. Your opponents will probably have already pushed him once to get to his Toughness and Super-Strength on click two by the time you get to him – so you will probably have to hit him for at least four to put him down for good. He's only 39 points though, so outside of him throwing objects for a long-range attack – or an opponent planning on transforming him into Man-Wolf on clicks four and five – he can safely be ignored.

Man-Wolf has seven clicks of life. Whatever you do, don't land him on clicks three and four! You'll just be doing your opponent's work for them. Either hit him for four up front, or hit him for just one and then follow up for three or more afterwards. If you've got Outwit, use it on Charge for his non-Star God clicks – then you can just avoid him. If you end up needing to get rid of him quickly however, remember that he gets two chances to dodge on his first click with Super-Senses and Shape Change.

Charging Punisher has six clicks. His defense is completely bare on clicks one and three – so try to either hit him for three twice; or for one, two, and then three. Don't let him base you, though, because he gets Blades on his last three clicks! Outwit his Charge to keep this from happening – or Blades, if it's already too late for that...

Psychic Blast Punisher, with six clicks, is the bane of our existence in this tournament. Eliminate him immediately – preferably by throwing objects at him, because he's got Combat Reflexes on clicks one and four. He loses Psychic Blast by click three – so make him your primary target until you whittle him down to that point.

Thundra has seven clicks. She'll be after your big gun with her special power – so do everything you can to keep her from basing your best figure. She drops down from Invulnerability to Toughness on click three – so either hit her for four up front, or Outwit her Invulnerability if you can. Be aware that she picks up Outwit on clicks five and six – and although she won't be a threat alone by that point, she can use it to make the rest of her team that much more dangerous.

Abomination has nine clicks. As one of the few figures with Aquatic in this set, he's going to be one of the characters to beat in tournament play. Defensively-speaking, the very first thing you should Outwit is his move-and-attack abilities (whether Charge, or Special Power); with Indomitable being a very close second. Offensively, he loses Invulnerability on click four (and Super-Strength on click five) – so barring a timely assist from Outwit, try to hit him for at least five up front. His final two clicks, clicks eight and nine, feature Regeneration – so either finish him off if you can, or Outwit it if you're able.

The Leader has six clicks. He's a very unusual character in this format. He's got an entire dial's worth of Outwit, a natural range of seven, and ranged attack powers on every click but his second. On his first click, he can use TK to move based characters away from him – so be cautious when not Charging to base him. He's also capable of dealing penetrating damage on his final four clicks (even up close, with Pulse Wave, on clicks three and four) – so he's always a potential threat until he's been eliminated. Take out his Mastermind fodder first, if at all possible – then hit him repeatedly for as much damage as you can.

Skaar has seven clicks. His dial's unusual in that, while his best clicks are his first two and his final two, the middle of his dial is relatively weak for the points. Every effort should be made to knock him onto his third click – on clicks three, four and five, he can safely be ignored. Be mindful that his defensive powers get bumped up a notch whenever he's adjacent to blocking terrain – which potentially gives him a chance to dodge on clicks one, two and seven. Oddly enough, his best click – click six – is his second-to-last: Charge, Blades and Exploit Weakness! Defensively-speaking, you should Outwit Charge whenever it appears.

Lyra has eight clicks. She's incredible for the points – and because of her Marquee write-up, everyone will be using her. She gets conditional Probability Control to re-roll her own attacks on her first four clicks! She's capable of dealing at least three damage for a whopping six clicks straight – and she doesn't lose Charge until click four. Barring Outwit to remove her first-click Invulnerability, you're going to need to hit her for at least five up front to really even weaken her. Defensively-speaking, always Outwit her movement powers... even Leap/Climb on clicks four through eight!

AIM Renegade has four clicks. Although he's a generic figure, you shouldn't under any circumstances underestimate the threat that he represents to your team! If your opponent places him next to a character that has range, this figure will be sharing the Hydra team ability and Enhancement on clicks one and four; and if if this figure is out on his own, he'll be pushed onto clicks two and three for cheap Outwit! Either way, eliminate him quickly – and always try to make room for this figure on your own teams.

A.I. Marine has four clicks. Although he can't hurt any figure with Invulnerability or better, he might take some players by surprise on this map with his Aquatic movement. After an initial click of Toughness, his defense on clicks two through four gets significantly better in close combat with Combat Reflexes – and he gets a chance to dodge on his final two clicks with Shape Change! Note that, although he becomes a significantly greater threat once transformed, he also loses Aquatic on Movement. However, he also boosts the AIM Marine Hulk's Attack value – so the likelihood both would be played together if pulled is also high.

Black Tarantula has seven clicks. He is capable of damaging figures with Invulnerability or better on every click except for clicks two and seven. He's got a single starting click of Invulnerability himself – so consider either Outwitting that, or else just hitting him for three (arguably his worst click). He loses Running Shot on click three, and picks up Charge instead – so Outwit Charge to keep him from basing you, or Blades if he already has. Outwitting his Special Power on Movement on clicks five and six is a no-brainer if he's already in base-to-base contact; otherwise, Outwit Regeneration on clicks six and seven, so that he can't heal. Don't forget that he's also got a range of six!

White Tiger, with six clicks (and the possibility of four more), is going to be a difficult figure to deal with in this format. A Stealth'ed Perplexer (albeit one with no other defense) on clicks one and two, your first inclination might be to baenseer – but beware, because she becomes an insane close-combat juggernaut on clicks three through six! At that point, your best option will probably be to peck away at her from a distance with thrown objects, etc. Try your best to get her onto click five as fast as you can, as soon as you can – if your opponent still has some other good figures in the game, then he'll be a lot less likely to bring her back into play! If you wait until she's the last figure standing, however, he'll get no penalties for having done so...

Uncommon Daredevil has six clicks. Knocked past his first click, he loses Outwit – which, with only two Damage of his own, he'll be using exclusively to help out the rest of his team. He loses move-and-attack by click three – and with his range of four, you can afford to save him for last until you've dealt with the rest of your opponent's team (although he does regain Outwit briefly on click five). There are several reasons why it would be best to attack him from range (Combat Reflexes, Close-Combat Expert and Super-Senses that deals damage if you miss) – but you shouldn't let that keep you from finishing him off if you get the chance.

Matt Murdock has five clicks. Only his first two clicks have Outwit – so try to hit him for at least two damage if you can. Beware of opponents planning to transform him into Uncommon or Rare Daredevil on clicks four and five! There are, however, two sets of circumstances under which you might want to consider playing Matt Murdock yourself: 1) he ends up being your only real option for cheap Outwit, and keep Uncommon Daredevil on the sidelines to potentially transform into; or 2) you can play both him and the Rare Daredevil together!

Uncommon Punisher has six clicks. Outside of clicks four and five, which both have Ranged-Combat Expert with two Damage, this Punisher can't even hurt the Invulnerability plus set – of which there will be many in this format. Remember that he has has an eight range though, so that you can keep your more fragile pieces out of harm's way. Needless to say, just keep him away from clicks four and five – and ignore him until all greater threats have been eliminated.

Jigsaw has five clicks. With an entire dial's worth of Willpower, he can act two out of every three turns – which makes him great on your own teams for just 35 points, but not so hot on your opponent's. Try to keep him off clicks three and four, which have Blades – otherwise finish off bigger and better figures first, because they're worth more points.

Rick Jones has four clicks. He's a wildcard, which is worth remembering if your opponent plays him alongside either Rare Daredevil or Ghost Rider. Although your opponent will probably push him to get Perplex on click two, remember that it will only take three damage to eliminate him at that point. After Toughness on his first click, he picks up Combat Reflexes on clicks two and three – by which point it would be best to either hit him from range, or ignore him outright. Absolutely consider playing him with A-Bomb, if you pull and decide to use the latter.

Hercules has eight clicks. He only has a single click of Super-Strength – so either Outwit his Invulnerability before you attack, or try hitting him for only three damage. He gains Impervious on clicks three and four, but he loses move-and-attack abilities on those same clicks – which means that, although you'll be safe from reprisal, you'll probably still have to eliminate him to win the match. He regains Charge (but drops to Invulnerability) on clicks five and six – and he also picks up Willpower on clicks six through eight, to keep attacking you turn after turn. Do everything you can to stay out of base-to-base contact with him – which may mean Outwitting Charge instead of Invulnerability on the clicks that he has both.

Amadeus Cho has five clicks. He has Outwit on all of them, except click four – he gets Probability Control on that click (and potentially on his first two clicks as well). He's got an entire dial worth of Energy Shield/Deflection – making hitting very difficult to hit at range. On clicks two, three, and four, he has Psychic Blast with a range of seven for one damage – which makes him dangerous, even for your figures with damage reducers. Although you shouldn't ignore immediate threats in favor of him, you should still try to eliminate this figure as soon as you're able.

Red Hulk has eight clicks. He's dangerous all down his dial – albeit somewhat less so when he hits his final two clicks, clicks seven and eight. Top dial, you'd have to hit him for seven up front (or six if you've got Outwit) to even decrease his threat level to an appreciable degree. He's got Outwit and full-movement Charge for his first three clicks – so if you can hit him for four up front (or three after Outwitting Toughness), you could land him on his least-dangerous click. Clicks five and six, however – with Charge, Impervious and Super-Poison – are his very best... so keep him off of them at all costs!

General Thunderbolt Ross has five clicks. I can't imagine that anyone would use him except in conjunction with the Red Hulk – but if they should, he's completely useless by click three when he uses Willpower. He can transform into the Red Hulk on clicks four and five, though – so be careful not to do your opponent's work for them.

Doc Samson has eight clicks. Again, it is highly unlikely that your opponents would use him in this format – but there are some things you should be aware of about him, just in case they do. He grants nearby friendly characters immunity to Outwit throughout his entire dial – so it may be worthwhile to take them out of the equation first. He doesn't gain his Super-Mind Control power until click three – and with zero range and no move-and-attack powers until his final two clicks, he can safely be avoided until you're ready to face him. Remember that Mind Control has a default range of four – so hang back further than that, and try to hit him from range if you can. And don't trust that your opponent wouldn't willingly take feedback damage just to Mind Control your big guns either!

Rare Daredevil has seven clicks. This figure is going to see a lot of play thanks to his glowing Marquee reviews write-ups – so your need to learn his dial will be two-fold. First, and most obvious, is that he's a Mystic – so if you're going to trade clicks with him, you'd better be damn well sure that you're doing more than just one damage! With a range of zero (except for clicks four and five, when he picks up Mind Control), and an entire dial's worth of Exploit Weakness, you really need to attack him from range if at all possible (even if you have to use up an object to do so)! By click four he loses Leap/Climb and Super-Senses – but he does pick up Toughness, so keep that in mind. His best click is his second, which your opponents will probably push to – so attack him with impunity from that point forward.

Shanna the She-Devil has five clicks. The thing about her is, her potential damage output is much higher than her point cost of 45 would otherwise suggest – so you underestimate her at your own risk. You'll have to attack her in base-to-base contact on her first two clicks if she's in hindering terrain – but she's got three clicks of Blades, and boosts her damage by one when you do so... However, she's one figure where it really pays to play keep-away: She has no way of dealing damage from range on her first two clicks, and can safely be avoided on those. She does pick up Charge and Willpower on clicks three and four, however...

Tiger Shark has eight clicks. With Aquatic movement, and move-and-attack powers on ever click (the first four of which being full-move Charge), he is absolutely one of the three figures to beat in this tournament. If you do end up facing him, Outwit his Movement powers each and every turn if you can. He loses Invulnerability by click three, and finally drops down to just Super-Senses by click seven – so don't be reluctant to press the attack... especially considering that, with the Masters of Evil team ability, he can attack you each and every turn that he's in play!

Man-Beast has eight clicks. He's got such an unusual dial layout and set of powers that he's going to be the most difficult figure to get a handle on how to play well against in this tournament. Absolutely be sure to eliminate his Mastermind fodder before you attack him, if you can! It's a toss-up as to whether your opponent will keep him in Stealth, with Blades, on his first click; or opt for Outwit, Psychic Blast and condition-specific Mind Control (with a range of six) on his second click; but either way, his Defense gets bumped up to Invulnerability on clicks three and four! When he finally loses Outwit on click five, he's much less dangerous – but you shouldn't count him out entirely just yet! On clicks six, seven and eight, he alternates between Psychic Blast, Blades and a final click of Psychic Blast, respectively – so try to hit him hard on his first two clicks, and then beat a strategic retreat.

Wolverine has six clicks. At only 70 points, with two opening clicks of Exploit Weakness, he could potentially be this set's giant-slayer... if he got a move-and-attack ability before click four, that is! As is, with zero range you can safely ignore him while keeping him from basing you, and/or just attack him from range. When you do hit him, try to do just three damage (two if you've actually bothered to Outwit his Toughness) – he picks up Charge and Blades on clicks four and five! Speaking of Outwit, be sure to Outwit his Regeneration on clicks five and six – that way you can knock him out and gain victory points for having done so.

Joe Fixit has eight clicks. At fifty points less than the Common Hulk, he does still bring some interesting powers and stats to the table. His first click is his best click by far – it has Charge, Super-Strength, Invulnerability, 4 Damage and 11 Attack – so when facing him, knock him off his first click immediately. Beware his ability to throw objects with an added Incapacitate effect on clicks two, three and four! He's got a move-and-attack ability on every click except for three, four and eight – so it may be worthwhile to Outwit these to keep yourself safe. Don't help your opponent by knocking him onto click eight, which has Regeneration – you'd just be doing him a favor! Get him to click four, where he trades Invulnerability for Toughness, and you shouldn't have much more trouble out of this figure for the rest of the match.

Ghost Rider has seven clicks. Like Rare Daredevil, hes got the Mystics team ability – but unlike that figure, you may actually want to target this character first. Here's why: If you didn't damage any of your opponent's other figures the turn before, then the Penance Stare Special Power doesn't work. This figure's best click is his third – it's got high combat values, Charge, and Invulnerability. With only Toughness to protect him on his first two clicks (and again on clicks five and six), try your best to bypass his Invulnerability clicks (clicks three and four) entirely. Don't forget that Ghost Rider, despite not having his bike, has a range of four – and that he gets Regeneration on his final click, click eight!

Spider-Man has seven clicks. The Spider-Man team ability could make him a nuisance to deal with if he's been paired with either Rare Daredevil or Ghost Rider. He does have a range of four with two bolts – and he's got Leap/Climb on every click except his last one, click seven – so you will have to decide whether or not it's more advantageous to attack him from range on the fly. Beware clicks four and five, which have double Incapacitate – it's got the potential to rob you of actions, and can hurt even Impervious figures that are still vulnerable to pushing damage. Outwit Super-Strength on clicks one and seven; Incapacitate on clicks four and five; and Super-Senses when you need to be sure of hitting him, and you'll be fine.

Caiera has seven clicks. With four opening clicks of Charge, she's immune to knockback damage for more than half of her dial. She's also got three clicks worth of Impervious, followed by four clicks of Invulnerability – which means that she reduces all damage dealt to her by two, when she doesn't avoid it outright. She's got Indomitable – making her a threat on two out of every three turns. She can make otherwise mediocre figures exponentially better by giving them and 18 Defense when in base-to-base contact – and that's a Trait, which can't be Outwitted. She picks up Perplex on click three; Steal Energy on click four; and Close-Combat Expert on click five. She even has a range value of three – so be sure not to forget about that!

A-Bomb has eight clicks. Like Caiera, his entire dial features Invulnerability or better (Impervious on clicks one, two, and three; Invulnerability on clicks four through eight) defense. He's also got protection from ranged attacks (but not from Outwit) whenever he's adjacent to walls or blocking terrain. In addition, he gets straight-up Stealth on clicks three and four – and Exploit Weakness on clicks three, four, and five, to make sure that the damage he deals up close actually sticks. With a range of zero, it's crucial that you Outwit his Charge on clicks one, two, five and six if you can. By clicks seven and eight, he drops down to Leap/Climb – so attack him from range at that point, because he can break away automatically from your big guns. Also try to remember that he does not have Indomitable – so try to use that to your advantage.

Ka-Zar has six clicks. With a range of five, he can't simply be ignored to start out with, like Shanna the She-Devil can. Two clicks of Stealth up front guarantee that he's going to be planted firmly in hindering terrain – but he's even more dangerous up close, due to an initial click of overlapping Blades and Combat Reflexes. His most vulnerable clicks are clicks three and four: He keeps Blades, but picks up Leap/Climb to break away – and he only has Super-Senses to protect him. Take care not to knock him onto clicks five or six – he gets Stealth back, and has a wicked combo of Psychic Blast and Close-Combat Expert to ensure that he's dealing damage at range or up close. Try not to forget that he has the Duo attack ability available to him as well.

Black Bolt has 10 clicks. He leaves room on a team for 107 points worth of other figures – as if he wasn't dangerous enough on his lonesome! With flying, three bolts, 9 range and Sharpshooter, he is absolutely one of the top three figures to beat in this tournament. Even Outwitting his Silent Scream Special Power on clicks one, three and five is no guarantee of safety – he can simply push to pick up Psychic Blast on clicks two, four and six! Basing him is no good – Pulse Wave ignores adjacency, and the Sharpshooter ability ensures that he can even make a ranged attack in base-to-base contact. With two starting clicks of Impervious – and Invulnerability on clicks three, four, five and six - it's going to take everything you have to defeat him. Be sure to Outwit his defense before launching an attack against him with your big gun – you don't want him to avoid a big hit for six or seven by getting his Impervious roll, after all!

Outback Hulk has 10 clicks. If you remember nothing else about this figure, it should be that you must not, under any circumstances, land him either on or near click ten! I don't care if you've got to push to KO one of your own figures, it'll be worth it if you can knock him past that last click. The rest of his dial's no slouch either: He's got Indomitable; he can hit at range or up close for penetrating damage on clicks two, three, four and five; Toughness doesn't show up until click six of his dial; and he regains Impervious on clicks four and five! He's got move-and-attack abilities on his first four clicks – though it may be prudent to Outwit his defensive powers (which are as follows: Impervious on clicks one, four and five; Invulnerability on clicks two and three) and eliminate him as quickly as possible.

Red King has 10 clicks. Remember that, as a giant, you should always have line-of-sight to him for Outwit and/or ranged attacks. He treats figures up to three squares away as though they are adjacent – which is crazy-go-nuts with his special knockback power that deals two damage to any figures who bump into each other on clicks two, three, four and five! In order to keep yourself safe, you should Outwit his Charge first on clicks one, four and five; and then his Impervious on clicks one through three, and Invulnerability on clicks four, five and six (in that order). Remember that he does not have Indomitable – so if you take away his move-and-attack abilities, he's going to have to push to even damage you, if you keep a safe distance away from him!

Cosmic Hulk has 10 clicks. If you see one of your opponents pull this figure, then pack as much Psychic Blast and/or Exploit Weakness onto your team as you can. Remember also that his Power Cosmic team ability renders all your Outwit useless – so don't overpay for that ability, just to have it on your team! He's got a range of five, and Running Shot with a 10 on Speed for his first two clicks (and Hypersonic Speed, of all things, on clicks five and six) – so do everything in your power to keep your big guns at least eleven spaces away from him, if he can take an action next turn (and with the Power Cosmic team ability, he probably can)! His least-dangerous clicks are clicks five and six – although he's still doing four damage at range with Hypersonic – and remember that, with no other figures on his team, there's absolutely nothing stopping him from using Pulse Wave on clicks three, four, seven and eight! He also finally loses Impervious on click five – dropping down to Invulnerability instead – so if you can wear him down to that point, then at least he'll no longer be able to avoid any damage you deal to him entirely... You've got an uphill battle ahead of you – so good luck, my friend!

(Note: I ran out of time to compose brief write-ups for the set's chase figures: the Hulked-Out Heroes.)

Dinky Reviews!

Thor (2011).

When I describe myself as an old-school Avengers fan, that isn't to say I've been one for some great length of time (unless six years seems like a lot to you), but instead to suggest that I'm primarily a fan of the old-school (i.e. pre- Brian Michael Bendis) Avengers.

Perhaps a bit of an explanation is in order. To make a relatively long-ish story short(er): My undergraduate thesis was a 36-page mock series bible for a hypothetical Marvel comic book series. I'd recently picked-up about half of the first Secret Wars from a nearby flea market - and I found myself fast becoming fascinated by Kang the Conqueror. I mean, what was this guy like when he wasn't relegated to the shadows of Victor von Doom?

I bought the Kang: Time and Time Again trade-paperback to find out - and I discovered that the eponymous Conqueror is primarily known as an Avengers villain. This led to my purchasing the Council of Cross-Time Kangs storyline from issues 291 to 297 of said team's series - and while I'd eventually go on to use him in my aforementioned academic proposal, I was no longer satisfied with just reading about Kang alone.

No, I was now actively tracking down anything Avengers-related - my wont for ascribing the modifier "old-school" to myself (due to Disassembled having rendered far too many of my beloved characters either functionally irrelevant, or literally deceased) notwithstanding! So what's my opinion of this movie, given that I'm sufficiently familiar with the source material?

In a word: It's awesome.

Seriously - this does a lot to redress my misgivings after the generally lackluster Iron Man 2! Sure, it isn't absolute perfection - Brain Blessed's absence alone is criminal (I would've even accepted John Rhys-Davies as Volstagg, instead of whoever it was that we actually got!) - but it's still by far the best cinematic outing we've seen from a Marvel character since Robert Downey, Jr.'s initial foray into the genre!

What more could you possibly ask for? How about an unexpected big-screen debut from a character who's going to figure more prominently into future films - and the now-obligatory bonus scene after the end credits as well!

Please, Just Hear Me Out...

Game of Thrones (2011).

I've met many fans of author George R. R. Martin's "A Song of Ice and Fire" series over the years. I can count amongst them close friends, personal acquaintances, and even individuals whom I've never met, but have instead merely respected from afar - admiring them for the quality of all the work they have done. However, the rate at which I read straight prose is prohibitively slow - so I awaited this particular adaptation with much anticipation.

As I entered this fictional universe for the first time, my expectations were nothing short of outright loving the experience - and in the very first scene, a great deal of that potential had already seemingly paid off! Was what we just witnessed some form of necromancy... and if not, would there - or, dare I even suggest it, could there - be an alternative explanation forthcoming?

So the show was successful initially - quickly capturing my imagination, because the opportunities therein seemed to be truly endless. Could it possibly be that television audiences were about to receive the actual fantasy that had, for so long, completely eluded former 'fantasy-fiction' programming?

Granted, some dire wolves do eventually emerge further on into the first episode. In and of itself, this isn't so far-fetched - not when one considers that, as an extinct species of their more familiar modern-day descendants, these wolves could conceivably have co-existed with humans in this (albeit fictionalized) era. As for the rest - well, the uninitiated might easily mistake most of it as being part of some unidentified film belonging to the historical epic sub-genre.

Most, that is... but not all.

I've been struggling to find the right words to use - fumbling for the correct things for me to say - even now, as I'm writing this. There is one reoccurring thought, however - a singular idea that I keep mulling about, yet still remain unsure regarding the best method of expressing - so perhaps I should simply just say it: Your opinions really do mean something to me.... in fact, they matter a lot!

Whew - that was more difficult admission than I might have ever guessed! Still, at least I can rest a little easier in the knowledge that you can hopefully better appreciate it when I say the following: I didn't approach Game of Thrones with any negative preconceptions - nor were any overly-judgmental attitudes present on my part.

Instead I must confess that my expectations for the show were actually quite optimistic - in fact, I honestly believed that I'd have given it all due credit by now! So I'm left to ponder whether or not it's even worth it to jeopardize whatsoever positive regard other people have for me - to risk alienating myself from those individuals whom I actually care about - by expressing an opinion that's in any way contradictory to the one which is most commonly believed.

All of which is my way of saying (though it pains me to do so) that I cannot - in good faith, and with a clear conscience - give this program my unreserved recommendation.

And that's because you might as well call it "Rape of Thrones."

It's almost as if, back in the day, George R. R. Martin said to himself: "This Tolkein stuff is pretty good... but you know what it needs? More rape."

Look - I love Alan Moore's "Watchmen" (as a stand-alone entity; I won't be discussing any adaptations or apocrypha herein). It too took a more innocent storytelling tradition - comic books - and infused it with adult content and themes (as well as literary techniques heretofore unseen in said format). But you know what the difference was there?

One word, my friends: "Attempted."

And I understand that rape already had existed in fantasy fiction beforehand, by way of Robert E. Howard's Conan the Barbarian... but then I'd ask that you watch John Milius' film of the same name, and tell me what the difference is.

That's right - they didn't show it.

I honestly did give Game of Thrones two chances to win me over. When the first episode featured a graphic depiction of rape, I thought to myself, "Maybe this was just an anomaly." But no - not fifteen minutes into the second episode, our collective sensibilities are similarly assaulted once again.

I've since heard about further happenings in future episodes... but I don't care that the perpetrator eventually gets his comeuppance (and speaking as we were about Conan: Thanks for ruining Jason Mamoa's entire acting career forever for me, HBO!); nor that his victim somehow inexplicably forgives him.

But watching rape - even of a simulated and fictional variety - is not my idea of entertainment. And it shouldn't be anyone's.

Dinky Reviews!

Source Code (2011).

When it comes right down to it, there's just one thing you wanna know about Source Code.

I can't blame you - I'd been wondering the same thing myself.

Got part of my answer when I finally noticed it was from director Duncan Jones - the man behind 2009's Moon. This inexplicably isn't mentioned in any of the film's advertising. Had I known this sooner, I myself - and doubtlessly others like me - probably would've seen it on its opening weekend.

Moon's theatrical run was extremely limited. Because of this, the film remains relatively unknown amongst general audiences - at least in comparison to the wide releases which most other movies receive. So focusing on Jones as the director might only have appealed to what otherwise would have been a very narrow - albeit also a vocal, and supportive - market.

And yet, none of this is the worst offense committed by the film's ad campaign. For that, we must travel back to the aforementioned question - which, in the simplest terms, is this: Is Source Code really just 2006's Déjà Vu all over again?

I'm glad to report that the answer is a resounding no. While the director's sophomore effort fails to achieve the same dizzying heights of his first film, Source Code does manage to rise above most of the unfortunate comparisons that one could make (for instance, the Nicolas Cage movie Next).

Are there any other films which might arguably tackle similar issues in a more satisfactory manner? Sure, I might make a case for Los Cronocrímenes/Timecrimes being better - but that's apples and oranges, really... and both films are ultimately enjoyable on their own merits.

In summation, while Source Code is unlikely to ever change your world, at least you should still leave the theater feeling entertained... and, more importantly, not at all like you've wasted your time and money (and in the end, isn't that what really matters?)!

Dinky Reviews!

My sealed "brick" of Giant-Size X-Men HeroClix (+ 1).

It should have been terrible - in fact, I half-expected that it would be.

But before we get into that, let's talk for a moment about super-boosters. "Super-boosters" are the width and depth of two regular boosters - and they take the place of the same in each brick (you can also buy additional super-boosters separately - thus the aforementioned plus one). Each super-booster contains one of six possible over-sized HeroClix figures - so the more that you buy, the greater the risk you run of unwanted duplication.

So why were my expectations so low in this particular instance? Simply put, I'd done even better on my last go-around than I ever could've hoped for - and with the unwritten law of universal averages being what it is, I figured that my 'luck' was due for a downturn.

Now because any expenditure in excess of a hundred dollars isn't an inconsiderable one for me personally, I actually prayed extensively regarding the contents of both this brick and my previous one of DC 75th. This time however, my pleading was different: Instead of requesting the exceptional, I merely asked for acceptable.

The first and most obvious thing was the contents of my super-boosters. Would the same excitement for these over-sized characters that led to my ordering one extra turn around to bite me by my receiving two of the same non-generic figure?

No. I pulled Apocalypse - my first instance of said character. And Onslaught!

But what about the standard-sized boosters? Well, when my third of such yielded SR (Super-Rare) Magneto ("Playtime is ended," indeed!), I literally said to myself, "I don't even care what's in the rest of my packs!"

But somehow, I managed to open the rest of the packs anyway - and my efforts were rewarded with SR The Captain from Nextwave (however, I didn't get every character I need for the complete team - I'll have to pick up Monica Rambeau at some other time), and the SR Cyclops/Phoenix duo figure (or, if you prefer, Scott Summers and Jean Grey)!

So not too shabby, all things considered!

Dinky Reviews!

The Last Exorcism (2010).

What a profoundly stupid little movie.

I could've written a perfect ending for this film. And to make matters worse... they totally set it up for it! In fact, I'm almost completely certain that many others could, have and/or will reach the same conclusions that I have.

Therefore, I propose the following experiment: For those who haven't yet seen this movie, please go into it with the thought that there's going to be some huge twist ending... and then try to figure out what it's going to be beforehand.

Now, having done so: Do you see what I mean? I'm sure I'm not the only one who sees it... am I?

Addendum: Whenever this film debuts on the pay movie channels (i.e. I don't have to buy it specifically - I'll just run a tape instead), I'm going to try to make a point of actually sitting down and typing up what I myself believe - and those who agree with my personal assessment regarding the same will likely concur - would've been a much better (and, in a perfect world, a proper/the "real") ending!

And here I was, all ready to log on and declare this to be my favorite exorcism film of all time... *sighs for what might have been*

Dinky Reviews!

My sealed "brick" of DC 75th HeroClix.

In HeroClix, a "brick" is a sealed set of ten unopened booster packs - in other words, half a case's worth of figures. HeroClix itself is a game wherein players use pre-painted miniatures representing popular comic book heroes and villains to square off against one another. As its name implies, the DC 75th expansion is a celebration of DC's seventy-five years of continued publication - albeit with an additional focus on the Blackest Night company-wide cross-over storyline.

As a customer, the brick that one receives is random - however, there is now a fixed structure of figure selection and rarity distribution within each individual pack therein as well. This is a relatively new advent with HeroClix releases - and, in my opinion, it is also a good one. For me, my reasoning behind this is simple: With the last expansion that I bought a brick from, DC Crisis, the contents were truly random. This turned out to be a problem for me because with that set, I only received two Super-Rare figures instead of three (which was the stated average amount). Not that big of a deal... until you realize that whoever bought the other brick from the same case as me ended up receiving a whopping five or six Super-Rares at my expense!

With DC 75th, I not only received three different Super-Rares - but I also got my guaranteed one-per-brick chase figure as well! However, this newly-fixed distribution within the bricks themselves has had regrettably unfortunate consequences for some other individuals, in that they purchased multiple bricks - only to find out later that they'd unwittingly bought the same one twice... right down to character selection and figure placement within every pack! For those like myself with limited budgets - those who only intend to buy a single brick - it shouldn't be a problem; but for anyone intending to procure greater volumes of product for themselves, I recommend proceeding with all due caution. There have also been reports of quality control issues concerning merchandise arriving in damaged and/or incomplete condition. I myself have, thankfully, seemingly sidestepped this issue in this particular instance.

I'm pleased to report that, overall, I'm quite content with my brick of DC 75th HeroClix. Although I'm a confirmed fan of the cosmic titles produced by both DC and Marvel, I knew going in that - realistically speaking - I would not be getting every Green Lantern-related character in this set. Now that I know which ones I already have on-hand, I can simply pick up additional figures on the secondary market. As far as Super-Rares go, I got: the Golden Age Green Lantern, Allan Scott - insanely good, gameplay-wise; the Golden Age Wonder Woman, one of the best versions of said character in HeroClix; and the first non-lantern, non-Crisis on Infinite Earths, non- Starro-slave incarnation of Barry Allen as The Flash. And, speaking of The Flash: My chase figure, Barry Allen as a White Lantern, has been described by authoritative HeroClix website HCRealms dot com as the "Best. Flash. Ever."

Additional musings:

Received two of every generic - except for, unfortunately, the Zamorons.

Six non-generic duplicates: 4 commons (Donna Troy, Crimson Avenger, Bart Allen and Green Arrow) and 2 uncommons (Queen Aga'po and Detective Chimp). Fortunately, whenever I get duplicates of non-generics, it usually makes up for one of the two having a truly horrendous paint-job (and thankfully, I didn't get any triplicates this time around).

Two common Dominators - yet no uncommon Ruling-Class Dominator to lead them. Similarly, no Solovar to guide my Gorilla City Warriors into battle. This situation will have to be remedied.

One of my two Easy Company Soldiers was in the same pack as Sargent Rock. Groovy.

One of these days, I'm going to need to pick up the super-rare Wonder Twins duo figure from this set in order to round out the Super-Friends!

I'm still missing three of the variously-colored Lantern guardians from the set. This includes, obviously enough, the super-rare Sinestro - I haven't got either of the Yellow Lantern incarnations of this character, and so Sinestro Corps Mongul will just have to suffice. I am therefore going to end up breaking down and purchasing Indigo-1, Carol Ferris and - sadly enough - a character that I totally love, Saint Walker, from the secondary market.

The issue isn't that I ended up getting Black Lantern guardian Scar - it's that, because of the overwhelming scarcity of other members of the Black Lantern Corps (at a rate of one in every sixty packs - that's a single figure per three cases! - from a previous HeroClix expansion, The Brave and the Bold), I'll probably never be able to build an actual team with two or more Black Lanterns...

I already owned all the good versions of Kyle Rayner, save for the limited-edition figure of the same name from the Collateral Damage expansion set, prior to this - however, the benefits available to this new version (post- Sinestro Corps War uniform, free telekinesis) guarantee that the new one will see some play from me.

Dinky Reviews!

Children of the Corn (2009). Starring Dee from Battlestar Gallactica (modern version), and my all-time least favorite character from NBC's Heroes!

It sucked - it suuuuuuucked!!!

"But Kit," I hear you asking, "did it suck?" Why, yes - yes, as a matter of fact, it did!

The little kid they got to play Isaac wasn't a good enough actor to carry this movie, he wasn't scary... heck, he wasn't even the least little bit creepy-looking! And I know that He Who Walks Behind the Rows was represented by some truly laughable animation in the original - but at least in that version they actually bothered to show him...

And what was up with that ending? Dude, they totally should've ended it with the line, "Scarecrow!"

So was there anything good in this movie? Well, the two adults were all right, I suppose. I did like the Vietnam flashbacks - but that alone wasn't enough to save this miserable piece of garbage...

Dinky Reviews!

Gamer (2009). Starring King Leonidis, and Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson. With bit parts for Q and Peter Petrelli.

There's a whole host of stuff in this movie that's confusing, makes no logical sense from a storyline standpoint, is never explained, or all three at once!

Big, loud and dumb is one thing. Leaving out whole swaths of information that's vital to the audience's comprehension of what's happening on-screen - whilst also failing to abide by any determinable set of rules as set forth by the film itself - is another.

For instance: [SPOILERS!]What was the deal with that guy who was killed three or four times, at least - yet somehow, by all appearances, kept coming back to life?

And what was up with the non-player characters (for instance, the woman dressed in traditional Islamic garb)? From what I could gather, a prisoner could earn their freedom if they survived just one day as an NPC... but even so, why did they turn John Leguizamo's character into one? As some form of punishment - simply for asking the guard for a little help?[/end SPOILERS!]

There's probably more that I'm forgetting... but suffice it to say: G'ah! This film made my brain hurt!

Dinky Reviews!

Open Water 2: Adrift (2006). Starring people forced to act like complete idiots by a lame script.

What was that ending supposed to mean, anyway? Seriously, I haven't a clue...

This is a prime example of the sort of film in which characters are much more stupid than most people in real life would ever be. I'm talking about just general common sense here - not from the vantage point of the audience being given more information to go on than the characters themselves are...

I mistook the only visible part of a life jacket - inexplicably colored purple (likely in the hopes that people would make just that kind of mistake) - from the DVD's cover as being a tentacle of some kind. You can see where this is going - oh, how disappointed I was...

This one was allegedly supposed to be truer to the "real story" than the first film was. In the end, though, it actually managed to be even less realistic than the original! Tons of blood in the water in this one - and yet somehow, nary a nibble from any (entirely non-existent, according to this film) aquatic lifeforms...

This is one film that's better off avoided altogether, folks...

Dinky Reviews!

Orphan (2009). Starring a cast of mostly relative unknowns who, regardless of their relative inexperience, still manage to turn in some great performances!

Don't believe those poor, joyless souls who tell you not to see this movie – it's a real slice of good old-fashioned, grade-A horror movie cheese!

Be that as it may... it is not, however, the kind of movie that you need to pay twenty dollars or more just to see in the theater! Try and do like I did instead: Hit the earliest possible matinee showing, scrimp on the concessions (you can sneak stuff in, if you feel you must), and check your brain at the door!

Seriously, though...there's a lot here that doesn't make much sense on that last count. But still! Mmm, cheese...

Dinky Reviews!

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009). Starring Peter Cullen, Frank Welker (and it's about dang time on that count – considering, you know, how Michael Bay totally snubbed him with a non-inclusion in 2007's Transformers!), the Candyman and Henry Jones the Third. Also some bony, greasy, and pointless slow-motion T & A in the form of Megan Fox – and some horrific racial stereotypes in the form of, well... in the form of some new Transformers!

I have decided that I will buy this when it's released on DVD. Probably not immediately... but eventually.

I will then write "This Movie Is Wrong!" on a little scrap of paper, and then tape it over the film's given title in a rather obvious fashion...

Dinky Reviews!

Legion of Super-Heroes: Darkness Rising (2008). Starring... well, Jim Shooter, as far as I'm concerned! And some awesome, honest-to-goodness new characters, too, such as Gazelle and Voice!

If ever there was someone capable of undoing much of the damage wrought by Mark Waid's completely unnecessary "three-boot" of the Legion's on-going monthly, Jim Shooter was it! This is the first time that the comic series has actually felt like the Legion since DC inexplicably booted Abnett and Lanning off of the post-Zero Hour franchise – just because Waid claimed that he could make the series an instant "best seller" with his name affixed (but then, DC's loss was Marvel's gain – what with Abnett and Lanning's new take on Guardians of the Galaxy, and all)!

It's too bad that everything can't go back to the way it was, though – for instance, Karate Kid had already been established as a heterosexual in Waid's new continuity... Also, I'm guessing that the reason for Mon-El/Valor being absent from the current roster is because Waid brought in the modern-day Supergirl for his line-up – but oh well, what can ya do...

EDIT: Much to my chagrin, DC Comics has since done away with the Legion's ongoing title entirely.

Dinky Reviews!

The Burrowers (2009). Starring Ethan from Lost, Kurgan from Highlander and Eugene Victor Tooms. Also some cool-looking monsters!

Look, I fully realize that not every movie has to have a happy-happy ending... especially when it comes to horror movies! But this one was just lazy. I mean, you know you've got a problem when I, myself – scarcely a Hollywood movie writer, at that! – can think up a better downer ending than the so-called professionals... and one that wouldn't waste the aforementioned cool-looking monsters, to boot!

Dinky Reviews!

The Happening (2008). Starring Marky Mark (sans the Funky Bunch), Cholo from Land of the Dead and the real-life sister of the actress who plays Dr. Temperance Brennan on TV's "Bones."

About the best thing that I can say about this movie is that it exists. That, and – in only the most literal of technical terms – it does, in fact, qualify as an actual movie (but only just barely). Never before (nor probably will I since) have I seen a film that just shows up, fails to engage the audience on any level (unless boredom counts), and then just as quickly leaves the screen... and all completely without explanation!