The Marvel Cinematic Universe makes its first big mistake.

In the interest of full disclosure, I should reveal that I own each of the following trade paperbacks:

Marvel Masterworks: Captain Marvel - Volume 1
Avengers: Kree/Skrull War
The Life of Captain Marvel
The Death of Captain Marvel

So it was with some dismay that I learned that - according to the 3/4/14 episode of Agents of SHIELD entitled "T.A.H.I.T.I." - [SPOILERS!] apparently the Marvel Cinematic Universe version of Captain Marvel is just some guy who's already dead.

Not only that, but they got certain fundamentals of the character completely wrong. Mar-Vell was a pink-skinned Kree, belonging to the lower caste - never blue.

Also: What was up with him being a giant, and having overtly alien features such as elongated fingernails/claws? And don't give me that it's actually based on the Ultimate Universe, because a) it shouldn't be, since that doesn't count/isn't canon; and b) even if it is, I DON'T CARE!!!

If they're going to do that, why even bother using Captain Marvel in the first place?
[/SPOILERS!]

The Clairvoyant on Marvel's Agents of SHIELD is:

Have I got your attention? Good. Because I want to assure you that I have no special insider knowledge. I'm just a guy with a keyboard.

That said, the Clairvoyant on Marvel's Agents of SHIELD is totally Dr. Samuel Sterns from The Incredible Hulk (2008) - portrayed in the film by actor Tim Blake Nelson. In the comics Sterns is better known as the super-villainous Leader.

What has led me to this conclusion? Three things:

1) It fits with the character's skills and power-set in the comics;

2) Nelson, the actor, has appeared on TV before (of particular interest: his leading role in the short-lived 2011 CBS series CHAOS);

3) Emil Blonsky, aka the Abomination - who likewise featured prominently in the aforementioned film (portrayed therein by Tim Roth) - was recently mentioned on Agents of SHIELD (in the 2/4/14 episode, "T.R.A.C.K.S.").

EDIT 4) Actor Adrian Pasdar has recently been confirmed for an upcoming episode in the role of Major Glenn Talbot. That's right - another Hulk villain.

Regarding Uatu the Watcher's imminent death in Original Sin #1:

Such a pointless waste of a beloved character. So I guess this means, no more What If? People born in decades hence will no doubt look back on Kirby's "Coming of Galactus," and wonder who that bald guy is on the cover of Fantastic Four #48.

And really, what purpose does this serve? Can any possible new story that results from this outweigh what Uatu himself brought which was at all unique to the Marvel universe?

I think not.

How To Fix DC Comics!

(A series wherein I propose the sweeping changes necessary to salvage these once-beloved characters)

Language is a funny thing. In this day and age of political correctness, many are the mutually agreed-upon terms used to describe distinct groups of individuals. But what happens when no such societal rules exist for proper nomenclature? It's especially troubling when one wants to avoid an impression of discriminating against others based solely on differences in appearance. How, then, might one best proceed?

In this instance, I sought out the advice of just such a person – and she assured me that there was, in fact, a phrase which is both representative and non-hurtful.

I'd like to therefore talk today about “big girls.”

Amanda Waller - Just because a change would be easy, and entirely cosmetic in nature, doesn't mean it's any less important. Quick – name all the big girls in comics (at least half of which belong to Marvel). I'll note the issues present with each.

1. Granny Goodness – Look, there's a reason her voice is always provided by Ed Asner.

2. Anaconda – Look, there's a reason people call her Man-aconda.

3. Big Bertha – Doesn't count! In her normal form, she's actually a supermodel.

-and-

4. Amanda Waller – The only true representative thereof.

...or at least, she used to be. By presenting audiences with a reality wherein all women conform to an unattainable level of feminine beauty, DC does everyone a disservice. Why cater to such unrealistic male fantasies? I mean, how does “The Wall” even make sense anymore as a nickname for her?

So while changing Waller back would necessarily render said character incongruous with recent live-action depictions, that's an unfortunate dilemma of the company's own creation. And the results – another big, beautiful woman in comics (a strong African-American woman at that!) – are too important not to.

How To Fix DC Comics!

(A series wherein I propose the sweeping changes necessary to salvage these once-beloved characters)

In Iggy Pop's immortal ode to Hollywood, "Butt Town," there's this line: "But the girl with the hair flies by in her underwear."

I always joked that it was a reference to Starfire.

Starfire - Loathe as I am to defend any aspect of her portrayal therein, there's this run in Red Hood and the Outlaws wherein Koriand'r wears a sci-fi style flight suit. Form-fitting? Sure! But at least it covers her up...

Why can't she just wear something like that?

Look, I'm no prude; far from it. My all-time favorite show is MTV's Beavis and Butt-Head - and I'm a huge horror movie enthusiast (which often contains copious amounts of both sex and nudity). But this is too much.

Especially when you consider that not one, but two animated series - aimed largely at children - have been based on the Teen Titans.

People, we live in an internet age. If perverts and pubescent males want to see stuff like that, they don't have far to go. Get this girl some clothes.

While we're on the subject, what's with the ongoing sluttification (is that a word?) of the character?

1. She's a princess;

-and-

2. In my proposed reboot, she's a married woman (having gotten together, and actually been allowed to stay with Nightwing - not once again split up by editorial fiat)!

So you're not just offending women everywhere - you're providing a terrible role model for young girls to look up to. And that's just got to stop.

How To Fix DC Comics!

(A series wherein I propose the sweeping changes necessary to salvage these once-beloved characters)

Aztek - Look, Grant Morrison, I get it. DC wouldn't let you write one of Superman's solo titles, so you were mad. Still, was that any reason... to blow Aztek's frickin' head up?!

Just strikes me as a bit childish, is all I'm saying (especially in light of the fact that you've actually since written a solo Superman series)...

If you were Hispanic and looking for a superhero with whom to identify, who would you choose?

1. Vibe - His series was cancelled due to poor sales (and I mean, c'mon now - Vibe? Seriously?).

2. Blue Beetle (Jaime Reyes) - His series was cancelled due to poor sales (although admittedly, he perhaps works best as part of an ensemble - personally I'd put him with Young Justice).

-or-

3. FRICKIN' AZTEK!!!

Gentlemen, I rest my case.

(Incidentally, if the New 52 wasn't the perfect excuse for bringing back characters like this, then what was the point of the whole reboot in the first place?)

Robert Venditti Destroys The DC Universe

As a result of "Lights Out," the Green Lantern Corps is abandoning Sector 2814 (aka Earth).

And Supergirl's becoming a Red Lantern.

...

[EXPLETIVE DELETED!!!]

Ya know, I never thought I'd say this... but I'd rather they cancelled every single Green Lantern-related title than allow this rampant bastardization to continue.

DC: Done Collecting.

How To Fix DC Comics!

(A series wherein I propose the sweeping changes necessary to salvage these once-beloved characters)

Batman allies:

Dick Grayson - is Nightwing. Leader of the Titans. Married to Starfire (sorry, Babs!). Back in black-and-blue.

Jason Todd - is the Red Hood. Just like he is at the end of the DC Universe Animated Original Movie, Batman: Under the Red Hood. Countdown/Infinite Crisis no longer having happened means that Superboy-Prime played no part in his resurrection. He's not an anti-hero, he's a villain.

Tim Drake - is Robin. Leader of Young Justice. "Red" Robin? That's Dick Grayson in Kingdom Come.

Stephanie Brown - is back! But she's the Spoiler. She and Tim are still dating. And just because she was never Robin doesn't mean she can't still be friends with Cassandra Cain!

Damian Wayne - Sorry, who? Robin is Tim Drake. Ibn al Xu'ffasch grows up to be a villain in Kingdom Come. Additionally, this means that his mother - Talia al Ghul - never killed her own son.

Carrie Kelley - Robin from The Dark Knight Returns. Stop trying to be cute with her turning up in the current books! Having her as a teen in the modern day makes no sense. And, seeing as how this is as good a place to mention it as any: The Dark Knight Strikes Again? Never happened.

Barbara Gordon - is Oracle. Leader of the Birds of Prey. Just as it should be. And there's nothing wrong with that.

Cassandra Cain - is Batgirl. She is as she was before "One Year Later" - i.e., mute and non-villainous. Sort of makes Strix from New 52-flavor Birds of Prey largely redundant - but if we have to choose one over the other...

Kate Kane - J.H. Williams III and W. Haden Blackman are back - starting with what should have been their version of Batwoman #26. Anything they say and do is considered gospel from that point forward.

Jean-Paul Valley - is alive! Seriously, why did they kill this guy off? Was it just a knee-jerk overreaction to 'Nineties excess? The only thing I'm personally undecided on is whether he'd be better off as Azrael (original costume), or as Az-bats in a new incarnation of Batman, Inc. Probably the former.

Calvin Rose - If one good thing has come from the New 52, it's the work Scott Snyder (no relation!) has done on Batman (for the most part - still not a fan of the whole "Joker wearing a mask that's made out of his face" thing). So I whole-heartedly approve the integration of the Court of Owls into any hypothetical new continuity - Talon included.

How To Fix DC Comics!

(A series wherein I propose the sweeping changes necessary to salvage these once-beloved characters)

Jack "King" Kirby - Everything Kirby ever created for DC is back - exactly the way it was when he last wrote it (i.e., if the man himself killed off one of his characters, then they stay dead)*. The goofier, the better! He was a literal creative god who strode upon this earth, and one would have to be a fool to reject his gifts.

That said, the following exceptions do apply:

1. Whereas Neil Gaiman's Sandman would hereafter be considered in-continuity/canon, nothing from Kirby's title of the same name should be allowed to contradict it.

2. The Newsboy Legion could be updated ever-so-slightly to better reflect modern times (for example, gathering intel for internet-based media outlets rather than shilling papers out on the streets).

3. The world of Kamandi, the Last Boy on Earth, and its titular character, is still Earth-51. However, where Countdown got things wrong was in erroneously assuming that there should have been - or ever needed to be - an explanation of the "Great Disaster"/the way things got to be that way in the first place.

I mean, if we all readily accept an Earth where things are (roughly) the opposite of how they are here, with little-to-no explanation given, can't we just accept Kamandi's world as-is?

*EDIT - Exception: Having literally just finished reading Cosmic Odyssey for the first time (12/1/13), I've decided that the events of this miniseries should still stand (the contributions to John Stewart's characterization, for example, are just too important for it not to count).

How To Fix DC Comics!

(A series wherein I propose the sweeping changes necessary to salvage these once-beloved characters)

J'onn J'onzz - The Martian Manhunter was once the heart and soul of the Justice League... and so he shall be again. I've never bought this paranoid, xenophobic (hypocritical much?) nutjob we've got now - what with his random fits of violent anger, and all...

So J'onn ought to be in the Justice League, while Cyborg is supposed to be in the Titans. Seems a simple enough solution, right? Why not just switch them out? Ah, but then you'd lose that diversity, you tell me. The answer there is easy, too.

What if Dr. Erdell - the man responsible for first bringing J'onn to Earth - had been African-American? And, in honoring that man after his death, the Manhunter takes on his appearance literally anytime he isn't in full-on superhero mode?

How To Fix DC Comics!

(A series wherein I propose the sweeping changes necessary to salvage these once-beloved characters)

First thing's first: The explanation ain't half as important as the results. I'm afraid another reboot's in order - with the following caveats:

1. Some stuff should directly follow continuity from before the New 52 (i.e., Teen Titans picking up after the events of The Titans vol. 1 #25).

2. Some stuff should integrate all the aspects of the character(s) that have worked best up until this point.

Beyond that, I'm just going to be throwing out suggestions to see what works. No particular order - and frequently brief, so as not to run out of material. For instance...

Top 3 Explanations For The (Aforementioned) Reboot:

1. No explanation given - nor is one necessary.

2. The New 52 was really just Earth-52 all the time!

- or (my personal favorite) -

3. The New 52 was a mass hallucination created by the Black Mercies!

How poor writing/decision-making rendered DC Comics' New 52 functionally irrelevant/"dead."

(An addendum to other recent posts)

Relic blew up Oa! That's certainly noteworthy... isn't it?

...except that it isn't. The Guardians themselves admitted (in Green Lantern: Emerald Dawn) that Oa itself ISN'T REALLY IMPORTANT.

In a near-death situation (Green Lantern vol.5 #4), Hal Jordan realized that his only regret was that he'd never see Carol Farris again. When he inevitably escaped and made it back to Earth, he immediately declared his undying love to her. He even tried, for her sake, to give up serving in the Corps!

So of COURSE the current creative teams on the Green Lantern books have her paired off with... Kyle Rayner?!

Still, I've got to give them credit for killing off John Stewart... until, that is, I remember that they once cured him of paraplegia to coincide with the advent of the Justice League animated series!

You know, it's sad but true - other than new releases based on the the pre- New 52 continuity (such as The Sandman: Overture), DC Comics ended sometime before Green Lantern: New Guardians #23.

Oh, and with Harley Quinn turning out to be a mass murderer... of children, no less!

And with the way DC editorial wrongfully screwed-over J.H. Williams III and W. Haden Blackman over Batwoman, too.

DC: Dumb Choices.

DC's Lights Out storyline event practically writes itself!

"Just wanted to say, loving 'Relic' as the villain's name."

"Me too! I mean, after 'Parallax' I really thought we'd already used every word in the dictionary."

"It's got the irony that hipsters love - what with it meaning 'old and obsolete,' and all..."

"So we've already killed off the Blue Lantern Corps. Who's next?"

"The Indigo Tribe? Haven't used those guys in a while..."

"Brilliant! They're gone. And after that... the Star Sapphires, maybe?"

"We're still getting rid of all the 'good' corps, right? ...except the Green Lanterns, of course!"

"Yeah, because anybody good must also be weak. But wait - didn't we just use Carol Farris in Man of Steel?"

"Ah, shoot! Well, we could kill off Fatality instead..."

*chuckles* "FINISH HER!!!"

*laughs* "Good one, Justin! But seriously, we've gotta keep her around for John Stewart over in Green Lantern Corps."

"Okay - so Relic will just slaughter the others, then. And destroy their central battery, for good measure."

"And don't forget their entity! That way it's like, Relic is so bad-ass he killed Love itself!"

"Nice! I like that. But what about the villain corps?"

"Sinestro's right out - he's wearing a yellow ring again in Forever Evil."

"Yeah, we gotta keep him around anyway because the Sinestro Corps War was so popular."

"There's always plenty of background characters there that never even had a single line of dialogue..."

"All right - so that's settled. The Red Lanterns?"

"Can't! They've got their own series. Plus, Guy Gardner's their leader right now."

"Hmm. Can we kill everybody but him?"

"Well, the title's Red Lanterns, plural - so..."

"Let's keep the cat! People love the cat."

"Yeah - and Bleez, for the sexual tension with Guy!"

"Naw, Ice is alive again... so we can afford to lose Bleez."

"And Larfleeze (hey - that rhymes!)?"

"...has a series now, too."

"Dang. I know! What if we had Relic kill off some Green Lanterns?"

"Eh, that's been done before. It'd have to be a main character to have any kind of real impact."

"Gardner's out, as we just discussed - can't kill Hal, because he was in the movie..."

"What about Kyle?"

"What about him? He's a White Lantern now, so we'll inexplicably be leaving him alone."

"...right! Because white's not a color, it's a hue."

"Exactly. And, speaking of..."

"John Stewart? The public was already up in arms when Green Lantern wasn't black in the movie!"

"Now-now, Justin - African-American."

"Right. Oh - I know! What about Jediah Caul? Because we already cancelled his series..."

"BRILLIANT!"

DC: Deceased Characters.

Doctor Who? Exactly.

The following came to me last night in a dream:

"Oh, say - does that bow-tie clad Doctor yet quit?
Oh well... he'll be replaced by another young Brit."

Meanwhile: Why Avengers: Age of Ultron? Is Thanos going to be designated as exclusive to the Guardians of the Galaxy movies?

[SPOILERS!]
Rumor has it that Ronan the Accuser will be the first film's villain. Will we have to wait for the inevitable sequel for our first full-on Thanos starring role?
[/SPOILERS!]

Please, Just Hear Me Out...

DC's Countdown.

Look - I agree with each and every criticism that's out there regarding DC's Countdown (issues 51-27)/Countdown to Final Crisis (26-1)... except, that is, for one. Even then, I'll grant that the topic currently up for discussion was deeply flawed in execution - and a complete failure in actual practice.

I ask you, though: Why can't Jimmy Olsen's girlfriend be an alien woman with (largely superficial) insect-like features? True, the relationship between "Superman's Pal" and New Genesis-resident Forager was entirely mishandled - and to be sure, there's no reason that a humanoid insect should have ever been portrayed as being better-endowed than even Power Girl! - but still, the concept itself is sound.

Under a different and much-better creative team, this same material could potentially be fascinating! The two would literally be star-crossed (and, post Final Crisis, extra-dimensional) lovers! And in a world where it's already common knowledge that aliens do in fact exist, Jimmy (writing anonymously, one would assume) might just have a great new angle for a series of articles regarding his experiences with interplanetary dating, as well!

"Thank god she's still alive... and weirdly gorgeous!" Indeed, Mr. Olsen - indeed. So who can we get to rescue this one good idea from the retcon hell to which the rest of Countdown has been banished?

True love is in danger, Star Sapphire Corps! To arms!

What I Dislike About...

Missed opportunities.

There's a distinction that, to my way of thinking, I'd make between a missed opportunity and mere wasted potential (the latter having been discussed briefly in my Aquaman article). Although neglected thus far, the possibility still remains that Aquaman may someday be taken in those selfsame aforementioned directions. However, in the example that follows, perhaps the most difficult task - doing the actual work, and then setting everything into place - had already been accomplished. Regrettably, all of the preparation in this particular instance would never be used to any real advantage. Meanwhile, the subsequent actions of individuals not directly involved would only serve to further derail whatsoever benefit there might have been in actually doing so.

It was a little over a year ago when I first read Brian Reed and Lee Weeks' Captain Marvel: Secret Invasion - collecting as it did the Civil War: Rebirth one-shot, and also the subsequent Captain Marvel mini-series. I loved it. Here was a book that skipped right to the heart of that which should be monumentally important to every single one of us! Through its protagonist - Mar-Vell, hero of the Kree-Skrull War - we're taken along on a journey of mutual self-discovery. It allows us to question the very nature of identity: what it is that makes each of us, deep down, who we really are inside.

Are we the sum of our thoughts, feelings, and emotions... or of some combination thereof? And is our heredity - the sheer random chance of our genetic heritage - in any way connected to our unique state of being, our individual sense of self... or even, as some might suggest, our 'souls?' In this, Reed and Weeks achieved the seemingly impossible: They made Captain Marvel infinitely more fascinating than he'd ever been before. Naturally, I began extolling the praises of Captain Marvel: Secret Invasion to anyone who would listen - even going so far as to mention it in the same breath as Silver Surfer: Parable (which is very high praise indeed)!

But then I (recently) read the core title of the Secret Invasion company-wide cross-over event storyline - the mini-series of the same name by Brian Michael Bendis and Leinel Yu - and I made an unfortunate discovery: The intriguing thought-experiment begun in Captain Marvel: Secret Invasion also ended there. There would never be anymore follow-ups along those same lines - in fact, it was all jettisoned in favor of some Johnny-come-lately poseur character named Noh-Varr (just check out the guy's wiki - he's more of a wannabe Brood than he is a Kree)!

And, perhaps most disheartening of all: It turns out that, through it all, Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning have been wanting to use the Captain Marvel character themselves! So basically this whole endeavor (or fiasco, as I prefer) was just a clever way for Marvel's veritable unofficial creative director to officially say 'no' to two of the best writers at the entire company. *sighs*

What I Like About...

Brightest Day Volume One.

The basic premise of Brightest Day couldn't be simpler: Twelve dead super-folks, consisting of a mix of both heroes and villains, are brought back from the great beyond by the Entity - avatar of the light of life itself, from which the White Lantern battery draws its power - to go on to serve some initially-unknown (presumably higher) purpose.

But why were these specific individuals chosen? Why were other, seemingly equally-deserving deceased superheroes not also returned to the land of the living - and why were there ever even any villains in the mix to begin with?

All of these issues and more are wrestled with by those who were resurrected to play some important role in the titular 'Brightest Day' that is still yet to come. And at the end of this first collection, these answers are indeed revealed... albeit in a typically-cryptic fashion.

Although the following example is also vague, I will not intentionally spoil which of the twelve characters received this particular revelation. Still...

[mild SPOILERS!]
(Paraphrased) "You have already done all that was required of you. Good job! Enjoy being alive again."
[/mild SPOILERS!]

Sure it's just a small thing... but man, is it ever cool!

What I Dislike About...

Unresolved plot threads.

Although my long-standing disdain for this particular phenomenon extends to pretty much any blatant instance of such abject laziness in overall basic storytelling technique, it's only recently been brought back to the fore and generally exacerbated by my having read Marvel's cosmic titles - from Annihilation through War of Kings - in their near entirety.

In all fairness, it's not my intention to single-out comics as being somehow guiltier of this practice (or even necessarily doing so more often) than anything else presented via other types of media. To that end, I present the following example (one of several I can think of off the top of my head - and bearing in mind that I haven't watched this show for over a decade) from Babylon 5:

The through-line of the series (except for an unplanned-for fifth season - one wherein they received a new budget from TNT after the series finale had already aired, only for the now-renewed show to be constantly rescheduled and barely ever shown thereafter) is mostly a build-up to a war against an evil race of aliens known simply as "the Shadows" - with said war ultimately playing out during season four. Anyway, it's eventually discovered that the planet shown in the background of every medium shot of the titular space station is actually home to an ancient device of incredible destructive power.

It's just the kind of thing which might turn the tide of that aforementioned war! In fact, two entire episodes are devoted to securing the weapon, and restoring it to its former fully-operational glory. So it comes as somewhat of a shock when the war is finally over, and the realization sets in with the viewer... that this so-called "super-weapon" was somehow completely forgotten, and ultimately remained unused!

The mere mention of unresolved plot threads from Marvel's post-Annihilation cosmic titles probably brings one thing to mind most readily for readers: Wraith. Here was a character that was introduced during Annihilation's sequel storyline Conquest - one who even got his own self-titled mini-series - and he was intended to then function as part war veteran, part folk hero to his people (the Kree) immediately following the story's resolution.

Now imagine what it would have been like if Lando Calrissian hadn't shown up in Return of the Jedi... and he was never mentioned again. Yeah - dropping Wraith was kind of like that.

But lest you think that I'm unfairly beating up solely on the architects of Marvel's recent cosmic series - Giffen, Abnett, Lanning, et. al. - I actually wanted to instead focus now on something that's been bugging me ever since I read Secret Invasion: a company-wide cross-over event, albeit one with admittedly cosmic (re: alien) origins.

All the signs from an ancient Skrull prophecy - a legend which tells of the alien race successfully conquering Earth (and that, in and of itself, begs an additional question: Just how long have the Skrulls known about Earth, anyhow?) begin to come to fruition. And then, whenever something goes wrong throughout the course of the actual invasion that follows, the Skrull Empress almost immediately makes a comment along the lines of, "This too was foretold!"

Now, putting aside for a moment the many contingency plans that the Skrulls had in place long before this invasion had even begun (almost as though they were still unsure about the final outcome) - and somehow also ignoring the fact that, even armed with the requisite foreknowledge, the Skrulls dutifully went ahead and made the same mistakes that they surely must have already known they were going to make - and once you've slogged through this entire series, you're left with the following sad conclusion:

So the Skrulls' prophecy is seemingly one-hundred percent accurate - that is, up until the exact point where it turns out that [SPOILERS!]the Skrulls still lose.[/end SPOILERS!] And naturally, Brian Michael Bendis offers up no explanation as to why the prophecy upon which this invasion was so clearly predicated somehow manages to get the most important part wrong.

What I Like About...

War of Kings.

If the original trilogy was intended to be the story of Anakin Skywalker's redemption, then surely Marvel's War of Kings must represent the redemption of Crystal.

Granted, I've read the explanation given for Crystal's status as co-narrator in Spotlight: War of Kings - but still, I'd like to imagine that it actually went a little something like this:

"You know who sucks? Crystal."
"Yeah, really."
"So let's take Crystal... and make her frickin' AWESOME!"

Seriously, I went into this storyline all ready to hate Crystal. Now, as it is with anything in which Jack "King" Kirby had a hand in creating (whether that be in whole, or in part), the potential was certainly originally there... but it had since been completely squandered by massive mishandling on subsequent writers' parts.

This was Crystal prior to War of Kings, in a nutshell: 1. Married Quicksilver, Magneto's son and long-time member of the Avengers, and bore him a daughter; 2. Conducted numerous extramarital affairs, both before AND after the birth of said child; and 3. Divorced Quicksilver after the fact, using the flimsy excuse that because she's royalty and he's a lowly commoner, they never should have even been married in the first place!

Ouch.

But under the watchful guidance of War of Kings collaborators Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning, something wonderful happened: We were given unprecedented insight into Crystal's innermost thoughts and feelings, as they were occurring! True, any potential attempt at excusing Crystal's previous behavior was predestined to fail... so these guys didn't even try. Instead, they took a sort of 'from here on out' approach to writing her - almost as if to say, "That mess was all some other people's fault!" So what did we, as an audience, learn from this?

As re-imagined by Abnett and Lanning, Crystal has grown so much as an individual that she now truly cares about those in need - regardless of who they are, or how society sees them - entirely without any thought of herself. Meanwhile, her budding romance with Ronan the Accuser is truly heartfelt and honest - a fact that's readily apparent to most any reader who's ever been in love... and not at all the sort of forced and ultimately false relationship which one unfortunately encounters far too often in popular fiction!

Plus, you've gotta admit: When Crystal took control of that enormous stone statue, and had it mimicking her every move? That (and therefore, by using it in such a fashion against her enemies, she) kicked ASS!

What I Like About...

Kang the Conqueror (Part 1).

Given the benefit of hindsight equal to such a task, life seemingly has an odd habit of proving people wrong in the long run. And it is with just such an intention that I now post the following: Amongst the non- comics-reading public, Kang the Conqueror’s name is unlikely to ever attain a comparable level of recognition as widespread as that of Dr. Doom or Magneto. More's the pity, then, because I feel that Kang shares many of the self-same qualities which make Marvel's best villains all so memorable. The character exhibits a similar sense of majesty and grandeur, whilst also retaining that air of unspoken dignity in the face of tragic circumstances which ultimately renders him relatable to the reader.

Perhaps it is this aforementioned lack of a more general renown - both with non-fans, and sometimes seemingly even amongst Marvel's own creative staff (in regards to an almost criminal underuse of the character) - which helps to elevate Kang's status (in my eyes, at least) as something of an underdog. Nevertheless, to merely suggest that this character's back-story is both voluminous and convoluted, and simply leave it at that, would be a gross understatement. I'd be remiss in any attempt I could make to adequately summarize, in a more-or-less thorough manner, Kang's expansive history, extensive motivations and all his capabilities... Therefore, I'll instead try to focus on that one most-singular facet of the character which I personally consider to be the most fascinating.

Now as a fellow diehard fanboy myself, I understand all too well one's natural inclination to nitpick an article such as this for each and every incongruity and omission - but the constraints inherent to recounting, in text form, what is so fundamentally a visual medium (i.e. comics/sequential art) means that absolute, one-hundred percent accuracy in relation to the original source material was perhaps never even realistically achievable. Consequently, I must humbly entreat the reader to make certain allowances for whatsoever liberties I might take - whether inadvertently, or not - in the following retelling. In return, I shall spare you the headache of having to read about events which - in continuity - take place in the future, by referring to them using the past-tense (versus future-tense) instead.

In the 31st Century, Nathaniel Richards (distant descendant of the Fantastic Four's Reed Richards) lived up to the villainous epithet by which he is better known, insofar as managing to conquer the entire universe. Take a moment to fully consider all the implications of that statement: A lone human being subjugated - not just a single solar system, nor even a mere galaxy... but absolutely everything, everywhere.

And yet, even this was not enough. In what should have been his moment of greatest triumph, Kang instead lamented that his victory ultimately felt like an empty one. For although he now reigned supreme over all of creation, the one thing he had failed to capture... was the heart of the woman he loved.